Blue Dancer

The fan blades spun slowly as the night grew longer.  It was hot.  Humid hot, the kind where you felt sticky.  Something beckoned to come out.  Couldn't explain what but he knew she was out there tonight.

The car engine started and the street lights blew by in a blurry vague dream-like breeze.  The music playing slowed down time giving the illusion that everything had an unhappy feel to it.  The neon that adorned the club stood out from the surrounding area almost like the light at the end of a long tunnel.

Was she there?

Inside, the innumerable bodies motioned and waved with the music.  The heat seemed to reach in here as well.  Glistening sweat reflected the multicolored lights and bounced it around the vast room in and out of all the depressed, lonely souls.

Blue eyes fell upon him.  Her hair was short, shorter than most and her black tank top stuck to her body for fear if it fell it would die.  She looked sad.  The feeling of emptiness was clear on her face.  He felt sorry for her without even knowing anything about her.  She danced like cream.  Her motions smooth and slow, he couldn't figure out how he knew she was sad but he just knew.  Like a higher power was leading him here tonight, under the lights, to rescue her from whatever it was that hurt her.
She was sleek and warm.  Her hair smelled of sweat and home.

Palm trees stood silhouetted against the night stars and passed the car in an unidentified pattern.  Her hand rose up and down coasting over the air that blew along the vehicle.  Eyes closed she bobbed her head to the music, her sadness filling the space around them.

The apartment bed was hard in contrast to how soft her clothing was.  The lines of texture.  Locking eyes, you could instantly tell just how depressed her soul was.  Small tears invaded her eyes, holding her close he knew this was someone you didn't find too often.

Or did you?

Naked, her body reflected the aura of the illuminated sign outside ironically advertising a vacancy.  She held herself close almost as if defensively.  Sweat formed a cascading maze down her back and around her soaking hair.  He offered solace from the outside world.  She knew it was what she needed.  What would make it all better.  That's when she denied.

The car left the lot leaving an empty space surrounded by a cloud of dirt, taking the blue with her.  He never caught her name but has since seen her at that same club every night.  She dances through her emotions but cannot let them go.  Never saying what has her down and never letting anyone relieve the pressure.  Just that one night.

She gives a small smile from across the room.

The palm trees wisked by as the cool night air blew over her hand, flying up and down but never letting go.

Thoughts and Ideas... Ideas and Thoughts...

It looks to be dark outside, but who can really tell in here.  I never really know what time of day it is anymore.  What day is it? No outside communication, no media, no watches, calendars, phones.  The only semblance of time is lights out, breakfast, lunch, and dinner.  What has my life become?  It's a sad story.  It's not a story for everyone.  It's not even a story I like to live.  But it is my story and I shall bare it.  My life now can only go up, or that's what they tell me when we have our meetings in the dingy room with the long table.  I hate that room, but I love that room.  That room has a window and normally I can see the yard. It's even better when they let us out in the yard.  The feeling of the sun against my skin is nice.  I remember when I could feel that all the time. The heat feeling like it'll burn my skin. It's nothing like playing with fire, but the feeling is almost the same.  I don't remember what exactly fire is like.  We're not allowed any sort of open flames here either.  There's not much to do, i just have to bide my time.

You become like a pack rat here. Finding little things to call your own. The few things I've stowed away under my mattress had been dried up grass clippings and a small rock.

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It's hard to say really when my life turned around.  It wasn't something that changed in an instant or even over night. There were little things that changed my outlook of the things around me.  Small bits and pieces fitting together like a puzzle.  The world around me becoming clearer until it felt like I could see everything for what it was.  We work our days through menial jobs over and over again; day after day.

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If you knew me and my life and the things I've seen then you'd probably wish that you hadn't seen them and run the other way.  Most people can't deal with the things I've put up with, but then again, what I've done and where I've been, most people wouldn't even have a chance to do a fraction of it.  You see, I'm not from here.  I'm from a place far away.  Sure I could go into the whole "Star Wars" intro:  "A long long time ago, in a galaxy far far away".  The problem with that is.. I'm not from a long long time ago.  There's no time like the present, right?  Yes it's true. I've traveled great distances to be here on your planet.  For what, you ask?  Well let's just say, if you're lucky enough your planet won't be destroyed before you finish reading this.

It's true other species outside of your planet do exist and

Another Chapter

The pencil hit the paper in an erratic rhythmic motion.  Shapes became emotions, strokes into life.
He could feel her with every line.  Memories deeply ingrained now poured themselves out onto the page.
Hair in strands of silk draped over soft porcelain skin.
Running between my fingers.
Wet passionate lips reflect through longing eyes.
Hands intertwined, we move with grace as the music guides our bodies in melodic dance.
The graphite grinds away while the pencil tries feverishly to capture that moment.
That memory.
That feeling.
Shades and shadows grow darker.  Emotions colder.  Arguments louder.
Sorrow and pain fill the gaps, no longer of cherished reminiscence.
What once evoked joy and fulfillment now only hurts.
The strokes broader, lines messier.
Memories now tainted unable to achieve their once brilliant luster.
The surface now covered as the pencil tip snaps in two.
Broken.
Her face stares through the mess, her beauty unfazed by the chaos around it.
The pencil hits the floor, mournfully tossed.
The music flows to a close.
A moment now lost.

Chapter 2 - Kyle

Kyle was the type of kid that new a lot of people, but still didn't have many friends. He kept to himself a lot. It wasn't that he didn't want to hang out with friends, but it was more like his friends forgot that he existed. He wasn't sure how that worked, being that he was always there for everyone when they asked, but somehow he could always feel alone in a crowded room. There was only one person that has ever made him feel like he wasn't a lonely soul in an overpopulated world, Jason. For most people, when you found the one person that makes you feel the best, that would be the end of the story, but this was just the beginning for Kyle.

Kyle didn't quite understand his feelings. He had been confused for a few years now. By the time you're in your early twenties, one should know who they are and where they are heading in life. Kyle knew that he was different and he was still trying to figure out who he was. Some would call him sheltered. But it wasn't his parents that kept him that way. He made himself that way. Sure he felt like an invisible friend, but that might be because of his own doing as well. He always sat in his room, playing video games or watching movies, and think about what he could be doing. Most of his friends however didn't find the thrill in just playing games or watching movies. They wanted to go out, have adventures, and cause mischief whenever they could. Adventuring and having a good time outside with his friends was fun, but still the feeling of being left out clouded his excitement.

"Earth to Kyle!" Kyle's friend Megan said, startling him out of his day dream. He looked up at her and saw her looking at him with a smile on her face. They had been friends for a long time now. And by "a long time" it's been about three years. "What distant planet are you visiting today?"

"Huh?.. Oh. Sorry. Was just thinking" He returned her smile. After realizing where they were, his smile soon vanished. They were sitting in class. This was probably the worst class that he would ever have to take: The Art of History. The subject matter wasn't even the worst part. It was listening to the teacher drone on about how great the art was and also repeating the word "Class" at the beginning or end of every sentence. Sometimes it happened at the beginning and the end.

"Now Class, remember that you have your projects due at the end of next week, class."
Kyle shuddered every time he heard the word now, which is why he was trying to zone out completely and not pay attention in the class. He was however thankful to have one good friend in there with him. He thought back on his daydreaming. His thoughts about how he doesn't feel like he had many friends, but looking at Megan. He knew he could call her a friend. After three years of knowing each other, what else would she be.

"Do you want to get out of here?" He whispered, leaning over to her desk.

The smile on her face said it all. She packed up her things quietly and placed them in her bag. She stood up slowly so that no one would notice that she was making a move for it. Kyle looked around the room and saw that most of the other students were sleeping or doodling. He let her exit the classroom first. After she left, he waited a moment or two before packing his own bag, and then followed her lead.

The hallway was very bright compared to the classroom. After closing the door behind him he walked towards Megan.

"So what're we gonna do? 

Chapter 1 - Ryan

Ryan was sitting at his usual table in the plaza.  Enjoying the summer sun as it beat down on his neck.  From the warmth he knew that his neck was probably going to be sore tomorrow, but he wasn't worried about that right now.  He was concentrating on the movements that his hand was making.  Helping the pencil in his hand touch the paper, the sketch that appeared was coming out perfectly.  Sure there was an eraser mark or two, but he could always touch those up once he scanned this piece of work into the computer.  No one would know the difference.  As he finished with the shoe he was drawing, he couldn't help but smile.

"Looking good." A friendly stranger said as they walked passed.  Ryan looked up and smiled at the man walking by.

"Thanks" he said, but the man was already out of earshot.

Ryan looked back down at the drawing in front of him.  He could definitely feel his artwork was coming along. As he was about to put his pencil back to the paper he felt the vibration in his pocket.  He placed the pencil down on top of the tablet and leaned forward so he could put his hand into his pocket.  He fished for a moment and pulled out his phone. After unlocking the phone he saw he had a text message.  Opening the message he noticed it was from Heather, his girlfriend.  He hadn't heard from her since Monday.  It's been 2 days since they last conversed.  He had sent her a few texts hoping for replies each time, but has been kept waiting.  Finally she responded. 

He opened the message and read the following:

I'm sorry, but i can't do this anymore

Nothing more, nothing less.  That was the entire message.  As his heart sank in his chest it beat like a time bomb. It was obvious what the message meant.  There was no mistaking it.  His relationship with Heather was over, but why?  With his mind on autopilot, he closed out of the message and opened it again.

I'm sorry, but i can't do this anymore

It was still the same.  Why?  He stared at the message for a few more minutes hoping the letters would rearrange themselves and be a happier message.  But the letters didn't budge.  He closed the message out again. Dialed her number by heart and listened to the ringing through the receiver.  One.  Two.  Then he was listening to her voicemail.  Dismissing the call, he placed his phone on the table in front of him covering the picture he was drawing.  He looked up from his phone and watched fountain in the middle of the plaza.  The water spewing upwards from the ground suddenly stopped and splashed back down.  The thud that came with the splashing water made Ryan jump.  With that, he noticed that tears had begun to build up in his eyes and push their way forward.

He picked his phone off of his tablet and saw the picture he was drawing.  It was Heather.  He was drawing her.  Thinking about her as always. Why the sudden change?  Did he do something wrong?  A tear fell onto the tablet.  He quickly wiped his eyes and looked back at the phone in his hand.

I'm sorry, but i can't do this anymore

He hit the reply button.  His heart, now in his stomach, ached.  How does one convey all the pain into a response? Should he even respond?  He had to know why. He canceled the message that he hadn't started and put his phone down again, closing his eyes.

***

"You can't put that there!" Heather laughed as Ryan was putting his glass down on the coffee table.  "You need to put a coaster under it!"

He looked at her and laughed.  "There aren't any more coasters."  He looked around the room. 

"Guess you'll have to just hold on to your glass, then." She grinned at him.  The sparkle in her eyes made his heart flutter with happiness as they joked around with each other.

"Guess so." He sat back against the couch with her at his side.  He slowly moved his hand with the glass in it towards her leg.  "This looks like a good place to rest it." The glass now resting in his hand, but on top of her knee. He leaned his shoulder against hers and moved his head closer to hers.  She was still grinning and her eyes slowly began to close.  His lips pressed against hers.  The feeling of peace and calm fell over him, except his heart.  It skipped a beat.  This was what love feels like.  There was no reason to worry about anything else at the moment.  He was with the girl he loved, lips touching, passion happening, nothing could ruin this moment. 

He felt the glass slip, water spilling down her legs. She gasped as the water soaked through her pants immediately.  Though it wasn't the waters fault she was wearing those soft fuzzy pajama bottoms at the time.  She jumped up trying to pull away from Ryan but he had her pinned to the couch.  He smiled at her and she glared at him.  "Too bad there weren't any coasters left.  We might not have been in this predicament."  He kissed her again before leaning away from her so she could get up.

She laughed at him again as she stood up and pulled her pants down to free herself from the wetness.  She shook her head, he figured she didn't know what to say to him.  "Yeah right! You wanted me out of my pants!"

He couldn't help the grin that crept across his face. "Nah, that wasn't my plan at all," he said slyly as he stood up from the couch and making his way towards her.  "But, now that you are..."  His smile was mirrored on her face as she did a little dance before he embraced her.  Both laughing as they fell against the wall with a thud.  He had her pinned against the wall, her hands held within his own.  Their lips pressed together in a never-ending kiss.

Their hands unraveled from each other and found their way across one another's back.  Their lips parted so Heather could say, "It's only fair that you take.."  His lips pressed against hers again and the rest of her words were lost in a kiss.  The passion that these two held for each other had never been greater.  As they pulled each other closer, Ryan opened his eyes.  He watched as Heather's eye remained close. He felt the warmth in his chest and knew that they were in love. His heart was beating quickly in his chest.  He closed his eyes again and continued the kiss for a few more moments.

Without a word between them, their kissing stopped.  He stepped back and made to grab her hand.  She glanced down and grabbed his hand and she looked back up, their eyes meeting.  A smile spread across her face as she led the way towards her bedroom.  He knew her roommate wasn't home, this was a prime opportunity to show her how much he loved her. He closed the door behind him as she laid down on the bed.

***

He opened his eyes.  His heart felt crushed after the memory faded away.  He felt hollow inside.  Sliding his finger across his phone to unlock.

I'm sorry, but I can't do this anymore

He locked his phone and leaned forward once again, placing the phone back into his pocket.  It wasn't going to get better by staring at his phone.

He looked down at the table in front of him.  Another reminder.  The picture he was drawing seemed to be staring back at him.  Can't do this anymore? He was still looking at the picture in front of him, but his eyes were no longer seeing anything in front of him.  He was seeing with his heart now.  The world-ending news he just received made everything freeze around him. There was no more time or space.  Nothing existed anymore.  Without Heather in his life, life just had no meaning.  Why?  Why now?  They spent the last year of their lives together, spending more time together than they did apart.

The world came back into focus.  He closed the cover to the tablet in front of him.  There was a shout at the fountain in front of him and he quickly looked up.  There was a little girl standing beside one of the tall geysers.  She was soaked.  Holding her head down, hands up to her face, she was crying.  He wanted nothing more than to do the same.  There was just one problem.  He had to get to class.

new story idea...

I had this crazy idea today and I wanted to write about it.. here's a teaser for the possible next story by me... 

Life, Death, and the Journey Beyond. 

What they tell us isn’t always true.  When life ends, we stick our loved ones into boxes and send them 6 feet below, or have them turned to ash.  But what if I told you, it was all a lie?  That after your last moments on earth your life doesn’t end, but instead you keep on living.  You don’t get to live on Earth with your loved ones, but instead, if you’re lucky, you move on to Heaven.  Not the Heaven that everyone likes to believe in.  There’s no walking on clouds, or unlimited food and goodies, just life after death.  Word about the true Heaven has never been published or spoken on Earth, but that’s all about to change.  What I’m about to share with you is my story.  Life, Death, and the Journey beyond. 

Ticket To Heaven

Little Joey woke up today and he had a smile on his face. He'd been waiting for this day for a year. He hadn't seen his grandmother since exactly one year ago. He spent the entire year waiting for this day. He marked it on the calendar and worked hard to save money so that he'd be able to make the trip to see his grandma.

He remembered the last day that he saw her. She slept peacefully in the box in the front of the room. He remembered she looked so beautiful, so calm. He asked his mom why Grandma was sleeping inside the box.

"Grandma is just taking a little nap. She'll be awake sometime soon." She explained to him.

He smiled and went out of the room looking at all the crying faces around him. Some hiding their faces in tissues and others carrying on conversations with those standing nearby. A lady, she was in a red dress, stopped him and picked him up. It was his aunt. He remembered his mom telling him who she was. He hadn't seen her in a long time and had to be reminded.

"You ok, Joey?" his aunt asked him.

"Yes." He smiled. He saw the streaks from her eyes. "Are you?" he questioned her in return.

She sniffled and nodded. She gave him a big hug and replaced him back on the ground. He looked up at his aunt. "Mom says that gram is just taking a little nap. Do you think she'll be awake soon? So I can play with her again?"

She gave a half huff of a laugh and smiled. "It might not be soon, hun. But you will get to see her again and spend all the time that you want to with her. She's taking a trip though."

"Where is she going?" He asked.

"Well..." she paused. " She's going to Heaven. It's very far away."

"Oh...ok" he said when something caught his attention and he ran away from the lady in the red dress.

He thought on this idea that Grandma was just taking a trip and that she would return. He wasn't sure where Heaven was, but he knew he wanted to surprise his grandma and visit her someday.

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A few months later Little Joey sat outside on a nice day at a table and sold lemonade. He saved his money in an old coffee can. He remembered everytime that the change jingled inside how his grandma used to drink this brand of coffee. He smiled.

"What are you saving for, Joey?" one of his customers asked him.

"I'm saving to visit my grandma" he said with a smile. "She went on a trip, and I want to visit her."

The lady put a few extra dollars into his coffee can. "Thank you!" he expressed with a really big smile.

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He had a few more lemonade stands throughout the rest of the year and saved all of the money he was given for his birthday and holidays. The coffee can was just about filled to the top. He carried that can with pride down to the kitchen, where his mom was preparing his breakfast before he had to go to school.

She laughed when he placed the can on the table. "Honey.. what is that for?"

"Today's the day Mom." His excitement couldn't be contained. "I want to go see Gram... Can you take this and buy me a Ticket to Heaven?"

His mom stopped what she was doing. Tears built up behind her eyes and pushed forward. "You don't need all of that to see grandma, sweetie. Grandma is in your heart. She's with you everyday, you just can't see her. She is there, though. Every decision you make and every moment that you smile it's because she's right there with you."

He looked at her confused. "But I want to see her."

"I know you do, baby. But where Grandma is.. we can't see her there. Where she went, she became a superhero. She's invisible now. That's the power she was given so she can watch over you wherever you go."

"So I don't need a ticket to Heaven?"

She tapped him in the heart as she said. "No, Grandma is with you right here."

He smiled at his mom as her tears still streamed down her face and he hugged her tight. "Now, go get ready for school." He nodded and started to walk out of the room.

As he walked through the doorway he looked around only seeing the walls around him. He looked back at his mom and then turned back around. "I love you, Gram" he said to the empty room. Just as he finished saying it, he felt a breeze ruffle his hair a bit. "I'll see you again, someday"